Imagine checking your phone to see that awkward text from someone you’d rather not deal with—maybe it’s an old friend asking for money, or perhaps the dreaded ex. Now, multiply that by about a hundred million, and welcome to the world of international diplomacy a la Belarus. Avoiding these texts? Pure art form. Responding to them? Well, that’s where things get dicey.
The Art of Ghosting… Diplomatically
In a move that could make any Tinder veteran feel like a novice, Belarus has been trying to navigate the rocky seas of international sanctions related to prisoner releases. You know, just the usual ‘slap-on-the-wrist’ followed by ‘let’s-make-a-deal’ that global politics loves to play. Imagine dodging your landlord because you’re late on rent, but instead, it’s other countries tapping on your door about human rights.
Read The Room
How does Belarus respond, you ask? Well, it’s a bit like reading the room and then realizing maybe it’s better to just blend into the wallpaper. When you’ve got the European Union, the United States, and others queueing up like eager contestants on ‘Who Wants to Be a Sanctionaire?’, the typical response involves a lot of diplomatic muttering and strategic ignoring. It’s the international equivalent of ‘Oh, I never saw your text!’.
‘Sorry, New Phone Who Dis?’
But it’s not all ghosting and avoiding. Every now and then, Belarus throws a bone, like a cat bringing back that one sock it stole, showing just enough cooperation to keep things interesting. The promise of prisoner release is like sending, “Sorry, new phone who dis?” to the international community—a reset button that’s supposed to erase all previous missed calls and unread messages.
So, next time you’re trying to duck an uncomfortable message, take a page out of the Belarus playbook. It might not be pretty, but hey, it keeps the conversation going… sort of. And who knows, you might even get out of answering that text!